Excuses For Leaving Work

Once you’ve got yourself to work, thinking up excuses for leaving work can get a bit complicated. After all you’re standing, or sitting, right there all in one complete, unbloodied piece, so what’s the problem? You can plead sick, but unless you can turn green on cue, your boss just might think all you’re doing is trying to come up with excuses for leaving work early.

You can opt for the “I’m expecting a delivery” ploy.

Unless you’re a secret agent and routinely have to sign for documents delivered to your front door, make sure the delivery is for something big enough that you can’t carry it under your arm. A fridge or stove is ideal. Having a dishwasher installed is great too.

It’s not like you could get these into your house by yourself and most places don’t deliver on weekends. No one allows strangers into their home alone these days, so your request to be present is valid. Appliances are pretty much necessities, so simply telling you to figure out something else sounds too inconsiderate on your boss’ part. You shouldn’t have a big problem with this one.

Home emergencies can work as excuses for leaving work.

You get a phone call from a frantic spouse, or neighbour if you’re doing the single thing, over some impending disaster that only you can head off at the pass.

The one problem with the emergency phone call method is you have to solicit the cooperation of another person, remember this emergency isn’t actually happening. To my way of thinking you’re putting yourself in a delicate position.

Since this hasn’t actually happened, ok, it’s a bald-faced lie, you’re leaving yourself wide open to extortion. Even the most genteel of people can’t resist temptation all the time. Eventually the dark angel riding on their left side is going to win one, and they are going to call you out for a return favour. Just warning you.

So what kinds of emergencies make good excuses for leaving work?

There are several simple ones that can do the job nicely

A water pipe broke in my house.

This is important, and it happens. Most bosses won’t question this.

It does help if the person calling you calls from your house, though. Unless there is water gushing from your basement window it would be tough for a neighbour to see a busted water pipe from his house across the street.

The sump pump quit, my basement is flooding.

Pretty much the same as a busted pipe, just a variation. This calls for some heavy duty rain dropping out of the sky to go off without a hitch or, snow melting in a big hurry. Don’t even try it in the middle of a dry spell.

My wife, or other half, ran over a …

dog, a cat, a frog, the neighbour’s kid’s pet hamster. She’s a terrible wreck and I have to console her.

Not to leave you ladies out

but you need to twist this one just a bit. You ran over a dog, a cat, a frog, the neighbour’s kid’s hamster and you’re a wreck. Hey, and don’t forget to do your better half a favour and get him out of work to console you.

Excuses for leaving work can be tough. Unless you come up with something that is non-job related pretty much anything else is going to sound like ‘I’m sick of being here, I want to go home.’ The real problem with that is your boss is going to take it as a direct insult, not good for boss employee relations. Keep your excuses for leaving work as detached from your job as you can.